When I was coaching folks in the corporate world, I ended up working with a lady who had the reputation as being a very difficult person. I’d heard all sorts of horror stories about her. At first, she was quite wary of working with me ( or any coach). After a while a rapport with trust developed between us and she opened up. Who I came to know was a very lovely person who had, like all of us, quite valid reasons for developing her suit of armor. The objective of my work with her was to have her see the great qualities she had and to be the real person she was, not who she thought the person in her role was supposed to be.

It ties in with levels of consciousness and self-protective vs growth mindsets.